familiar celestial panorama…

paranoia

i slowed down,
choosing to spend the day
chasing
down bullet proof jackets,
or something like that,
normalize the breathing,
bring down the pulse.

what weren’t quite gunshots
echoed off what wasn’t
quite the door. nobody
should ever be knocking like
that.

quick & dirty
clean-up tends to follow;
pressure cooker philosophy
due to the manner of arrival.
i don’t set the rules,
just tryin’ to evade them.

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8 Responses to “familiar celestial panorama…”

  1. Jessicas Japes Says:

    I like your style. The poem is making me paranoid too!

    http://jessicasjapes.wordpress.com/2010/11/22/magic/

  2. evade? hmmm i forgot that is paranoia. good job!

  3. It was probably just somebody looking to sell you a timeshare. (LOL!)

    Nice piece!

  4. quirky and clever. Middle stanza my favourite, the ‘not quite gunshots’ etc ‘nobody should ever be knocking like that’. The brevity of the piece adds impact for me. One line stands out as being unneeded and also semi-repeating another line (but not in a ‘using repetition as poetic device’ kind of way) – ‘or something like that’ (line five, stanza one).

    Great piece, dude

    (mine are here- I put some older ones up that never saw much traffic-
    http://lukepraterswordsalad.wordpress.com/2010/05/28/160/
    http://lukepraterswordsalad.wordpress.com/2010/05/16/alice/

    • Thanks man, will read them tonight. Funny you mentioned digging out older poems that didn’t get traffic; I did the same with one of my entries this week. Great minds think alike I spose…lol. Catch you later man.

      crb.

  5. powerful piece.

    the word choices are eloquent.
    Thanks for sharing your talent with potluck today.
    Happy Tuesday!

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