never anywhere…

never anywhere these days

lost in an unrecognizable place;
greased, gonzoed, n’ pretty far
gone. sweet relief from thinking
too hard or too much ’bout any
prior footstep before one last
foot-drag brings a wall within
reach of a roach makers hand.

braced up against ceiling support,
breathing deeply the scent
of bastardized me; a
mirror-perfect imitation of
misspelled words pressed into
service as the best of what’s
available under circumtsance.

i need a new body,
a new set of lungs,
kidneys, muscles, discs.
sharper edges & a keener
shine. if the scene ain’t
what it used to be
i still dress the part.

smashed glass testifies to
past failures of judgment,
some pissedoffedness at a
prepackaged jerkoff party
type accusations. got called
a cartoon character &
my reply was ungentlemanly
in the extreme. repartee
not even close to my high
standards, the conversation
terminated at name calling.
(i’m a little two-
dimensional, admittedly.)

i’m not worried, i just love the
sound of my knife ripping
across the fabric on couch.
v. komodoensis in jeans,
wearing my best scars as jewelry,
stealing existence, backwards
hat & dusky eyes. it’s
all destruction, no orgy, no
need to wonder about a shot
motor or radioactive fallout
or shampoo in my eyes.

just early enough for hashed
brown breakfast & another
chance at another day. slap-
dash cavalry is here to rescue
everyone. in our piece of
faith, doped past the gills
& watching the same movie,
asking the same questions,
& moving in the same
d
i
r
ec
ti
on.

never alone.
never anywhere.

——————————–

Inspired by a show of unity when things could just as easily fallen apart. This time, I actually do wish I could help; since I can’t, I’m guessing hash browns, eggamoobiemuffins and maybe, just maybe… orange juice. Everything a growing boy needs. And no, this has nothing to do with that delicious, wonderful, tasty, delicious image in my head of food. Shenanigans on that. Que ridiculo.

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20 Responses to “never anywhere…”

  1. It’s been a while since I visited. Damn, I love this, it is great!

    “i’m not worried, i just love the
    sound of my knife ripping
    across the fabric on couch.”

    Damn those lines spoke to me in a weird way. Brilliantly done!

    • Good to hear from you DP88. Glad you enjoyed the poem; the lines you quoted were a reference to something an ex-gf once said after seeing my ripped up couch. I thought the image fit well within the poem after I changed some of the meaning begind it to better illustrate a point. Like I said, glad you enjoyed it. Hope you’ve been well,

      crb.

  2. Dayum!!!
    I shouldn’t be enjoying such beauty in misery but you do it so damn well, thus I will blame you. I have read this more than 10x already

    So many lines ring true…dayum!!! but the most preferred are:

    “i need a new body,
    a new set of lungs,
    kidneys, muscles, discs.
    sharper edges & a keener
    shine. if the scene ain’t
    what it used to be
    i still dress the part” Boy do I dig this…”.still dress the part”. And I’ll bet you do it quite well…

    “komodoensis in jeans,
    wearing my best scars as jewelry,
    stealing existence, backwards
    hat & dusky eyes. it’s
    all destruction, no orgy, no
    need to wonder about a shot
    motor or radioactive fallout
    or shampoo in my eyes.” TOTALLY freaking awesome…the metaphor yesayah and stealing existence is such a S. line like what!!! but I dig it most cause it can go two ways, that of stealing yours/other’s or regaining life through exchanged misery…hey if you do it so well…scars like jewerly yessssssss I just love this piece

    BTW, add a new pair of eyes but transplants have to be voluntary…

    pardon the gushing and saliva bits up in here
    Beauty in misery
    Just the title and last lines I gotta keep working on…don’t want you bringing it home yet…

    better days are ahead only if we allow them…hugs/smooch…

    • Wow, you totally win comment of the day. True, there was an element of sadness in the poem, but I had hoped to try to give it a silver lining in that there is always tomorrow. Lots of metaphor and symbolism, perhaps overly complicated but at the same time the best way to build up the overall gestalt. The context got a little bit bigger during editing than I had intended, but when I tried to make it more detailed it fell apart. Next time I will approach from a different direction and do better lol.

      You totally kick ass & are way too kind. Back atcha & will catch you shortly. Til later,

      crb.

  3. The shop, two blocks down the road to exit W1 to the airport, with doors colored in bluish-red, sells all kind of body types, complete or on parts. Got few for myself a week ago! As for the ripped fabric on your couch, think positive, your knife is sharp enough, in case you need to use it due to emergencies. Enjoy the hashed brown breakfast, have a bite and for me! Other than that … another perfection! Thanks!

    • Well lets start with a new spinal cord!!! This one hurts like a bitch & my patience is running rather thin with the constancy of the pain. Oh well, at least the hashed browns were good. Thanks much for the kind words & the book. However, I will have to send something back as a thank you! Totally appreciate it. Take care & stay safe,

      crb.

  4. I really have to read your poems carefully, it’s so easy to misinterprete them – so you must be doing something right with your words! Your works always create this image of a down and out cowboy type figure who keeps coming back for more.

    http://jessicasjapes.wordpress.com/2011/03/14/bubble-bath/

    • I consider that quite a compliment J. Have to admit to a bit of a laugh at the cowboy image, but shit, it beats the hell out of what I actually look like, so thanks for that as well. (Insert big grin here.) Appreciate the kindness & look forward to reading your entry in a few minutes. Take care,

      crb.

  5. well, many segments of thoughts,
    I do read more than twice, one sentence could not conclude the poem,

    Glad that you are in time for breakfast and enjoy what you do.

    lovely poetry,
    A++

    • Glad you enjoyed it J. True, it is a rather complex method of getting a certain feeling/idea into the mind of the reader, but the complexity is more in interplay between symbols and imagery than in the ideas on their own. The goal is always to express things using only shared experiences, though of course I don’t always make it. Anyhow, I’m rambling, so let me just say thanks for the visit and hope all is going well,

      crb.

  6. “wearing my best scars as jewelry,
    stealing existence, backwards” – -those two lines just painted the character with such clarity for me. It would be impossible not to want to help this person, but they probably wouldn’t want it.

    Stellar writing.

    • Never thought about it in those terms, but I suppose it makes good sense all things considered. Sometimes it ain’t that help is not wanted, but the inner-sadist doesn’t want to ask for a whole variety of reasons. Still, I guess exploring the limits of ability (or at least my limits lol) does imply success or failure of the individual rather than a group. All in how you look at it methinks. Wise comment my friend. Very perceptive. Take it easy,

      crb.

  7. wohoho! this is a real killer friend! here’s my potluck.. http://fiveloaf.wordpress.com/2010/04/27/cheesecake/

    • Glad you liked it. Definitely been a while since I felt like I got the wording close to right, but hey, a win is a win! Thanks for the kindness & I’ll be glad to check out your newest tonight. Thanks & stay up,

      crb.

  8. You’ve breached the northern Steppes and continue your journey! God speed into a new spring!

  9. gritty stuff and some great lines. Like!
    🙂

  10. Great depth…most enjoyable read. Thank you for sharing.

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